Balancing Business and Motherhood

You might have noticed my content is moving a little more towards architecture, drawing, and, in general, entrepreneurship. Life is and should be, after all, about natural growth and constant evolution. 

First off, let’s just say balance doesn’t exist the way we imagine it to. Work and family aren’t equal. The scales tip in either direction at different times of the day, week, month, or year. So that notion of fair, or equal is nonexistent. 

As a Mum

You are in the trenches of it all. All the noise, all the mess, all the milestones, all the joy, all of it almost all the time. 

Then they go to school and you miss it ALL. 

As an Architect

You live and breathe architecture. You know when someone’s an architect, you can spot them a mile away. They’re the odd one, wearing black, probably with funky glasses, and touching (or knocking on) all surfaces of a built structure. 

I have a sketchbook in the nappy bag and I have nappies in my Kate Spade laptop bag. 

But the two worlds don’t (don’t) easily blend. 

You’ve heard it before.

The identity of a woman changes when she becomes a Mum

It’s hard to explain - this might resonate with you or you might disagree. This didn’t happen to me until my kids went to nursery. So I kinda felt left out of this feeling until then. Until I realized these little monkeys had been my 24/7 for 2+ years each and I didn’t know how to go back to ‘normal life’ now they were off with their wee gangs at Leikskoli. 

…Did I want to? 

Oh my. That’s a scary thought. 

Designing out the next chapter

So I’m doing what I do best. I am designing. But I’m designing my life, my 9-3:30…until I can pick them up again, and yes, early because I am that helicopter Mum who missed them so much. 

• Architecture

• Design

• Drawing

• Family

• Iceland, etc. etc

These are all important pillars to me and so as I dive back into the studio, and my online courses, I’m opening up and sharing more about design, mindset, and all that is balancing business and motherhood in this next chapter of life. 

Stay tuned.

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if you are a mum getting back into work, what are your worries, fears, goals, hopes & dreams…

Welcome to the world, Angus Óðinn

Welcome to the world Angus Óðinn, born on the 14th of October 2021 at 9:01 pm in Reykjavik, Iceland.

Just like with Mia, I wanted to capture something from Angus’s birth without oversharing or being too graphic so please enjoy the family-friendly vlog. I went to the midwife for a check-up that morning, and as discussed, she did a sweep. After going for a lovely autumnal walk with Ingimar, I went home for a nap and woke up to my waters breaking at around 14:30 - similar to with Mia. I labored at home for a while and headed into the hospital at 6pm, Angus was born at 9pm. A happy, healthy little boy at 50cm long and 3.810 grams.

Watch the video

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Mummy, Pabbi & Mia love you so so much Angus xx

Back to work after maternity leave

Back when I was pregnant with Angus, and in preparation for maternity leave and life with two children, I took some time to plan how I wanted my business to work and grow as my family grew, and my focus understandably got challenged. 

This is where hindsight comes in. It’s it a wonderful thing?!

Honestly, I don’t know how I thought I was going to achieve all of the following. Sometimes, a lot of the time, I put such high expectations on myself, and that only leads to pressure and then stress and then feeling like I’ve failed or let everyone down. That sounds hard but I used to be very hard on myself.

But in Parenthood, becoming a Mum taught me a lot the first time around. You see the days are slow and you need to slow down with them or you will only feel frustrated and lost in it all, but at the same time, when you’re literally watching your baby grow up in front of your eyes, time just flies so you need to live in each and every moment or you’ll simply miss it.

It wasn’t until recently, with two kids and life to juggle, that I started listening. 

1. slow down and appreciate these moments

2. don’t put so much pressure on yourself, everyone’s just figuring it out

3. don’t strive so much for perfection, done is better than perfect

And with that being said, and now that Angus is 8 months old, I am finally sharing what I wrote about my goals for my business before the baby. 

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What I'm Doing To Focus And Grow My Business

I started with the intention of helping Interior & Architectural Creative Entrepreneurs successfully Design & Build their own careers and side hustles…but then we planned our wedding and went on to have Mia (and now baby number 2) so my content got a little sidetracked. This is of course fine by me and I’m glad I have documented it as content on my blog, but I feel now is the time to get back on track and refocus myself and my content, and keep working to grow my audience and make sure they are the right audience and that I am working to support them and share useful and relevant content. 

Pivoting v Refocussing

Pivoting is when you change direction and that’s totally ok in the online world, and in Motherhood too. Being honest, reflecting on your own life (keeping it real) with your passions and your drive is so important when you work for yourself, and run the show alone. Let’s be honest - if you don’t love it then your readers/followers/subscribers/clients can tell. 

• A pivot can reflect a new chapter in your life, i.e a move into more Motherhood related content

• Refocussing is when you kind of kick your butt and get back into gear - this is what I need to do.

Note: You might have already noticed some big changes around here like the categories for the blog have changed

Mindset

In preparation for baby number two, and taking some time to adjust to life with a newborn again, I want to get into the right mindset to best prepare myself and my business for this transition. Though I have no idea what to expect of life with a toddler and a baby, I do remember the newborn stage very well and the guilt that being a (self-employed) Mum can bring. 

So in order to prepare myself and my mind, I’m planning out work and goals now (whilst pregnant) and will be working on them up until I’m no longer comfortable enough to do so, and aim will post them around the 35th week of pregnancy. 

Note: Angus is 8 months old and I’m finally posting this

Blog niche

“Niching down” is a term we talk about a lot within the blogging and social media world - whether you agree or not:

"When you speak to everyone, you speak to no one" - Seth Godin

I want, and need, to niche down more and drive more focused readers to my blog. In saying that, I will still be sharing Motherhood and Iceland-related content because I feel it is important to also document our lives but my aim is to help Interior & Architectural Creative Entrepreneurs successfully Design & Build their own careers and side hustles through my online courses, coaching, library, and blog posts and so that is what I am focussing on and niching down into. 

aim: Write 4-6 focused blog posts, of around 1200 words, on the topics of spatial Design and education to drive the right traffic to my site. These blog posts will be informative and share personal anecdotes, images, possibly videos, and a related call to action to offer something in exchange for the reader’s email. 

read the blog posts

YouTube

The aim is to share more tutorials and student-related videos on my YouTube channel and move away from the vlog-style family content. Professional and educational videos will support my blog posts and bring more eyes to my website and to my courses.

I aim to make videos on topics such as architectural education, tips for students, tutorials (how-to) and university advice, etc.

I will still post the odd vlog as it is nice to document our family and life in Iceland.

I have changed the channel name to my name in the process of this pivot

Online Courses

Online courses are great streams of passive income and are somewhere where I want to grow and build out more courses. I have loads of new course ideas safely kept on the notes app on my phone and up in my head (useful Sonia). Ideally, I would like to get at least 2 of these course ideas written, if not filmed over the next few months. Currently, I have a Portfolio Preparation class and an Interior Design class. These classes now have over 3000 students enrolled in them.

My courses are currently on Skillshare but at some point in the future, I would like to move them onto my own teaching platform, via this website, so I have more control over them and their growth. 

I really enjoy teaching, it truly is a passion of mine, and seeing my students upload their work makes me want to share more and teach more.

Looking back, honestly, I have no idea what I was thinking here. 2 new courses were way too much to expect. Pregnant at 40, looking after a toddler, and running my own business, whilst also buying a new home (and moving), and trying to prepare for maternity leave - it’s safe to say that new courses weren’t something I managed.

free resource Library 

I first set up the (then Layoutlines) Library of FREE Resources back in 2016 and have only added a few items as I grew, so it’s time to review and add some more templates and downloads.

A while back, I made some presets that I use all the time for my social media and these could work very well as a lead magnet and opt-in to the library. 

I would also like to update the graphics on the items in the library as they use my old branding and colours. I could take advantage of this and add my logo and create a hashtag, etc but doing this would be a lot of work and not something that is a priority right now. 

Online Shop & Etsy Store

I am happy with my online shop and Etsy store, and they’re both doing well as a good source of side income. I have considered adding my presets to the shop but I don’t think I will be adding any new designs or artwork in the next few months. 

I would like to play around with some more paintings and maybe watercolour artworks but I think this will be more of a fun/relaxing thing to do instead of the end result of being listed for sale in the shop. 

Instagram

I started the year with the goal of growing my Instagram following to 5K but in order to do this, I need to put in the work and get more consistent with posting and up my engagement. 

I think a big trick to getting more exposure these days can be through utilizing the reels feature so plan out some relevant reels:

• Behind the scenes in the studio

• What I’m working on

• Routines

• Around Reykjavik

• Self-employed Mum-life

I had a clean-up of my followers and recommend doing this, especially if you post family content and pictures of your children. 

Motherhood/business bliss

Last but not least, I want to take full advantage of this time as a Mum of one and a family of 3 before we welcome the baby.

Taking Mia swimming and to the park, out for coffee and Kokomilk, on her bike and all the fun things before there is a baby in a buggy with us or Mummy is wearing the ErgoBaby carrier. I can’t wait for our perfect little family to grow, and to have a son and a daughter.

It’s time to put in the work and get focused and back on track, it’s also time to enjoy what we have and make the most of it before the sleep deprivation newborn stage kicks in again. Here we go!!

summary

WHAT HAPPENED…

If you have been following us on Instagram, you will know that this year we moved into a new home, mid-pandemic. This was no small feat. 

Getting our old apartment ready to put it on the market, holding viewings, selling it, packing up and moving was a massive project whilst pregnant at 40, looking after a toddler on summer holidays, socially distancing, posting out orders, and keeping my business running but we did it and are so happy in our new home. 

Angus was born in October and I have hardly picked up my camera or laptop since. Those blog posts are sitting in the drafts folder, waiting to be proofread but I will get there. 

So as I slowly and gently return to work, I know what I want for my business, for this blog, and for my readers. I have big goals but I’m approaching them with a lot more self-care and there’s something to take from that.  

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Are you pivoting or refocussing in your business?

Mia Turns 3

Dear Mia, our cheeky little monkey. Happy birthday, today you turned 3!!

We have a three-year-old!!

Wow, what a big girl and you are so excited about your birthday this year. “Happy Birthday to me…”. You love singing and dancing, and asking to see videos from your previous birthdays - watch Happy Birthday Baby Mia. You absolutely love swimming and are very brave with your armbands on so this year we are going to Guðlaug Baths which is a natural pool on the coastline at Akranes.

Watch the video

ROADTRIP

Guðlaug is about a 40-minute drive from Reykjavik so we set off to pick up your cousin Kjartan and Auntie Ella Franka before hitting the road. You were so excited sitting beside Kjartan, singing, and screeching. Mummy packed some snacks and the birthday cupcakes for the drive home to Reykjavik, where Pabbi took us all out for lunch.

OOTD

Today you wore your Mickey & Minnie Mouse dungarees and you rocked them!! You hate having your hair done, much to Mummi’s disappointment.

THE CAKE

This year’s cake was blue and on the theme of Frozen, one of your favourite films to watch. It was a chocolate cake with blue icing and white chocolate stars on top in the shape of a 3. You ate a huge slice of it and then took half the cake to Leigskoli to share with your teachers.

I also made some cupcakes for our road trip - Kjartan loved them!!

MIA’S PRESENTS

A lucky girl, you got lots of fun presents for your birthday from magnetic blocks to unicorns, and a huge princess “ballaloon”. You also got the characters from Frozen, some bath toys from Freyja and books sent from your little pal Freddie.

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Happy Birthday our cheeky little monkey Mia xx

How I Knew I Was Pregnant Before A Positive Pregnancy Test

From tracking my cycle and ovulation to going over my early pregnancy symptoms, this is how I knew I was pregnant before I got a positive pregnancy test.

Watch the video

Tracking ovulation and my cycle

In this video, I go over the early pregnancy symptoms that made me think I was pregnant before I took a test and got a positive!! I was 99% sure I was pregnant BUT I had felt this before. After all, you can trick your mind into pregnancy symptoms and I have done that before. They’re not huge or obvious symptoms but I know my body so here we go, pregnant at 40.

Remember - every pregnancy is different, every woman is different.

Natural Family Planning

This is how I knew I was pregnant before a positive pregnancy test. I tracked my ovulation and cycle on Flo and in my diary. We practised natural family planning: I had regular periods and I knew when I ovulated so we could avoid/plan for pregnancy.

symptoms in Days Past Ovulation:

• 2 days sore boobs (only time)

• 3-6 days headaches/migraines, stopped drinking coffee, quicker (than normal) to get annoyed

• 7-11 days nausea, clear skin, less hair falling out

• 8 days cramps on the left side (implantation?), increased discharge, tired, emotional

• 9 days back pain, bloating

• 14 days past ovulation POSITIVE TEST

my last period

I got my period on my birthday and just thought “Why?!!” It felt like such a rubbish birthday present. But, in hindsight, this was to be my last period and so dated the pregnancy which was pretty cool and actually a really great birthday present.

Other symptoms

Ingimar pointed out that Mia had become very clingy to me, she has never really favoured one parent over the other but suddenly she was a bit more of a Mummies Girl. She was always by my side, telling me she loved me and stroking me. It was lovely but also like she just knew something was up.

And what followed

The last few weeks and months have been spent feeling very tired and nauseous. My days are ok but come 4 pm, the nausea kicks in, and then by 6pm I’m so tired (toddler mum) and nauseous that I can’t finish cooking dinner. By 8 pm, after the bedtime routine, I fall asleep with (or before) Mia.

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What early symptoms did you experience?

WE'RE PREGNANT!!

We’ve been keeping a secret...There’s a new creation in the works!! We can’t wait to welcome baby number 2 in October 2021!!

Watch the video

I am now 12 weeks pregnant so sharing our news and doing this pregnancy announcement is very exciting as it's been a big secret to keep. Getting pregnant with our second child wasn't easy, we tried for 7 months and finally, at 40 years old, we got a positive pregnancy test result.

We feel so blessed, so happy and so excited. Thank you for joining us on this journey.

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Who’s excited? we sure are!!